60 Day Fitness Challenge

I sit here typing this blog post with sore legs and back. Someone send a masseuse my way. Like immediately!!! I need a massage and a nap, ASAP. I had a hard morning workout yesterday, then my neighbor invited Zoe and me to Soldierfit. Soldierfit is an awesome place to get a great military bootcamp style workout. Right now they’re only in the MD/VA area, but check them out when they come to a city near you.

This past Saturday I registered for a 60 day challenge my gym offers several times a year. My baby boy, Kai, will be 2 next Tuesday, and I still have some baby weight to lose. I didn’t have this problem with Taj and Zoe.

I got up to 192 lbs with Taj and 198 with both Zoe and Kai. Yeah, I wasn’t thinking about being healthy while pregnant. I gained all the weight my 5’2″ frame could hold. With Taj and Zoe, I got down to 163 by the time I went to my 6 week check up. I was able to lose another 20 lbs on my own, mainly through running. Especially after Zoe. I was running 5K’s, 10 milers, and half marathons. My weight hovered between 140-145.

But bay-bayyyyy after Kai, I got down to 166 6 weeks after his birth and I’ve been there ever since. I’m not used to this much weight. Zoe draws family pictures and I’m always bigger than my husband. I asked her if I’m bigger than daddy and she said yes. I just laugh because kids are so honest. I’m not easily offended and especially when I know its the truth.

I had enough of eating just because it tastes good even when I’m not hungry. I got tired of being an emotional eater so I’ve had to find other ways to deal with my emotions. And I’m no longer accepting that I’ll have a C-section tummy for the rest of my life.

I’ve always been fascinated with the human body. I’ve always had an interest in fitness and nutrition. And now I’m taking what I’ve learned, and I’m starting to reshape my body.

I joined my gym, Life Time Fitness, in October 2017. I was working out just to say I was going to the gym and working out. The holidays were right around the corner and I needed some extra help keeping my weight in check since I would be consuming extra calories for the next 2 months. Yes, I planned ahead, lol.

I worked with a personal trainer once a week. He was good with the fitness piece, but he didn’t seem to be as concerned with my nutrition and neither was I. So I trudged along thinking I’m doing better than most just by going to the gym a few times a week.

This particular trainer left the gym for another job in February, so I was stuck on my own planning my workouts and trying to eat right. It cost me a lot of money to work with him, so at this point I was willing to do my own research and train myself. I went to see a nutritionist through the army. She gave me some great tips and advice. But I still wasn’t fully focused and disciplined.

Sidebar, if you’re an Army spouse, please take advantage of their free…yes, FREE… resources to help you get in shape. I know I don’t take full advantage of everything, but there’s no use in letting these great tools go to waste. You’re able to talk to nutritionists and get those expensive metabolic and body fat tests for free. Call or visit your local base’s fitness center.

So anyway, fast forward to mid April. A personal trainer approaches me and we start talking. She’s asking me about my workouts and my natural hair. I can tell she’s a cool chick, and I like her. She offers me a free consultation, so I take her up on it because I like getting a different approach to fitness from these trainers and how they like to work out their clients.

She gave me a hard workout and kept it real with me. That’s the way to get to me because if you fluff, I’ll fluff. But if you keep it real, I’ll keep it all the way real with you. She read me like she knew me all my life. All I could do was shake my head and comply.

I know I’m strong. I know I have a naturally muscular frame. I know that I’m physically fit…just with extra fat on top of my muscles. I also know that I can be lazy. That’s my Achilles heel.

She hit the nail on the head and told me I needed a trainer to reach my fitness goals because if I keep coming in the gym doing what I’m doing I’m just going to maintain and not change my body into what it could be. I actually lost 2% of my body fat in 4 weeks and I gained 2 lbs of muscle, which is great.

Now I know most people see me and say, “You don’t need to lose any weight”…”You look good to have 3 kids”…”Lose weight where?”. I’ve heard it all.

And no offense to these people who make these comments because I know they’re coming from a place of compliment, but I have fitness goals I’m trying to obtain. And left to my own devices, I won’t get there because I won’t push myself.

Long story short, I joined this challenge to jump start this next phase of my life. I’ll be 36 in July, my baby making years are behind me, and I’m excited to get my body in the best physical shape of my life.

I’m telling you all this because I’m preparing to do a bikini or figure competition at the end of the year or the beginning of next year. I need that accountability and cheers along the way because this journey isn’t going to be easy. It takes a lot of discipline and focus to eat properly and work out effectively so that you get those type of results.

I’ll keep you guys posted on how I finish this 60 day challenge. It ends July 7 so I’ll be sure to blog about it. I want to be a national finalist and hopefully win overall. That would be awesome! I know my husband would love for me to win just so he doesn’t have to pay monthly memberships fees for a year. Cha-ching!!!

You may not have extreme goals like mine of being a fitness competitor, but what goals are you trying to achieve that I or someone else could help you with? I love encouraging people and cheering you on to be your best self.

Sending love and hope your way!

 

I love you, Mommy!

I don’t know about your kids, but my kids said DaDa before saying MaMa…insert eye roll. No, I’m kidding.

Taj isn’t verbal, but I long for the day to hear him say Mommy. When I first heard Zoe and Kai say MaMa then Mommy, it melted my heart. Those little sweet voices are so precious.

Being a mom is a very challenging job, but I LOVE IT and wouldn’t trade it for the world. I do my best to be the greatest mom that my kids need me to be.

I had a beautiful example of motherhood, my mother and grandmother. Both are loving, giving, firm women of God. They taught me how to stay humble, take care of home, and be true to who I am.

Sidebar, I’m stubborn and hardheaded at times so I don’t always take heed to those words. But they trained me right so I have a well to draw from when I need water. I remember words and advice my mom and grandma taught me and it will come to remembrance when I need it

As a black woman and mother, I’ve picked up some ways of saying and doing thing that even make me laugh. You know how black mamas are. We say some crazy stuff to get our point across. I guess that moms in general, haha!

For example, when Zoe doesn’t want to go to bed because she wants to play. I’ll say, “you better play yourself to bed. Go meet the Sandman and ask him for a dream”.

That works for any scenario. Try it!

Child: “I don’t want to eat.” Mom: “You better eat your way to this table.”

Child: “I don’t want read a book.” Mom: “You better read this book or you’re going to read my hand across your behind.”

Anyway, back to some serious business. My mom was a single mom. With her village of my grandparents, aunts, and uncles, she did an amazing job raising my sister and me. I always thought my mom was the smartest woman I knew. She was a calculator, calendar, and encyclopedia. She was Google before there was the internet.

My mom wrote poems, did people’s taxes, filed FAFSA forms for upcoming college students, wrote and printed obituaries, drove kids and adults all over Chattanooga and North GA, the list goes on and on. And she’s still doing this today.

And let me tell you, she drove a stick shift most of my young life. But that didn’t stop her from putting her left hand on the wheel, change the gear with her right hand, then proceed to use the same right hand to reach around and pop my legs. That’s true talent right there 😉

She’s such a beautiful spirit, inside and out. She wants to see others win, and she will do anything to support those she loves. She’s a resilient woman who knows the call on her life, and she’s fulfilling her God given purpose.

My mom has always been my hero, and that’s what I aim to be to my children. If you can’t look up to your parents, even in adulthood, then something’s wrong. We must never stop learning and growing, because our little ones are watching.

As a grown woman, I still watch my mom making boss moves. She’s nearing retirement from her corporate  job, but she’s already making entrepreneur goals and plans for her next phase of life. Even fulfilling some of those goals right now.

My mom had me at a young age, 17 to be exact. I’m sure she doesn’t mind me saying because it’s part of her testimony. Everyone thinks she’s my sister. While I used to be annoyed, I love it now. I’m so proud of my mom! All of her accomplishments and her youthful look make me proud to call her mom.

This Mother’s Day, I honor my mom as my GOAT, greatest of all time. She means the world to me and I wouldn’t trade her for another mom. God ordained her to be my mom. And He ordained me to be Taj, Zoe, and Kai’s mom. I want to  their GOAT. I mean, they are my kids. Get it? Baby goats are called kids. Ok corny joke, I’m done!

Happy Mother’s Day to all!

Sending love and hope your way!

Growing pains


My daughter turned 5 on April 22, and for some reason I had a hard time processing her growth. She’s my middle child, so why was I feeling this way? Taj will be 8 soon. Why didn’t I feel this way when he turned 5?

To be completely honest, sometimes I forget how old Taj is, until I look at his long legs. Although Taj’s chronological age is almost 8, his cognitive and physical development is that of an 18 month old, or younger depending on the activity.

Now don’t get me wrong, he understands everything you say and what’s going on around him. He just has an inability to express himself with words making a sound out of his mouth.

Taj spent his 5th birthday in the hospital. On Friday, June 12, 2015, Taj went to his PreK graduation and slept the whole time. He was on stage with his classmates knocked out and unbothered. He wouldn’t even pull anyone’s hair or necklaces as they bent down to hug him. If you know Taj, you know he likes to pull hair and necklaces.

By that Sunday morning, the 14th, he woke up with blue lips and hands. I knew he had pneumonia based on previous experience. We took him to the ER, which always ends up in an impatient stay, and this time was no different.

Monday, June 15th, it’s Taj’s 5th birthday, and he’s in the hospital. At least he’s smiling and not struggling to to breathe anymore. I just don’t like being in the hospital, AND it’s his birthday. His 5th birthday at that.

So fast forward to last week when Zoe turned 5. I just kept hugging her and telling her I can’t believe she’s 5. She must have been tired of me because by the end of the night she finally asked me why I’m so excited she’s 5. I explained to her the best way I could for her 5 year old brain to process.

I never want Zoe to think I overlook Taj because of his disability. My husband and I teach Zoe and Kai to treat Taj like the older brother that he is. They play with him, talk to him, and love on him. It’s so cute!

But I did realize that I was putting a lot of emphasis on her 5th birthday. I had to stop and reflect on Taj’s life. He may not be walking, talking, and running around the house like a mad man, but dang it he’s 2 years away from being 10. Then I really started feeling the “my kids are growing up too fast” heartburn. I remember when I turned 10. It was a big deal to hit double digits, and my oldest will be there in 2 years.

I was losing it over Zoe turning 5 and then I look at my Daddy Longlegs and see how far he’s come in 8 years. It’s not the same accolades as a typical kid, but considering where Taj has come from he’s made a lot of progress.

Then to top this last week off, Zoe has her first lose tooth. I mean, her permanent tooth is almost halfway in and she just told me. Parents always say that your kids grow up fast. You blink and they’re graduating high school.

I’ll soon have an 8, 5, and 2 year old. Where are my babies!?! Oh well, my womb has gone out of business. I’m going to enjoy raising these beautiful children God has given me. They work my last nerve but I love them sooooo much.

Are there any moms and dads out there experiencing this feeling of not wanting your kids to grow up too fast? Please tell me I’ll be ok. I don’t want baby fever to creep up on me, lol. Please share how you cope with your kids growing up right before your eyes.

Sending love and hope your way!

Roll out the red carpet…

First giving honor to God who is the head of my life. I’d like to thank Abba Father for this award…

Oh I’m sorry, I thought was on stage!

But seriously, I was nominated for a Liebster Award. (Applause, cheers, standing ovation) Never heard of it? Neither had I…until now! It’s an awesome way to discover new blogs and meet new people. You have been informed. In the words of Maui from the movie Moana, “You’re Welcome”!

Thank you soooo much to Queenly Constance for nominating me. The power of social media is amazing, so I appreciate you taking the time to read my blog and finding me worthy to be acknowledged.

So what’s next?

1.) Acknowledge the blogger who nominated me. Enter the Queen, Constance. Thank you again, honey!

2.) Answer 11 questions Constance asked me about my blog.

3.) Give 11 random facts about myself.

4.) Nominate 5-11 bloggers for this award.

5.) Ask the nominated bloggers 11 questions.

11 Questions asked by Constance

1.) What is one thing you usually need to blog like a boss? Depending on the time of day that I blog, I need everyone in my house to take a nap or go to bed. I can listen to God more clearly without distraction from my husband and kids. I turn on some music and start writing like I’m talking to friends.

2.) How do you come up with blog topics? I go to God for EVERYTHING, so I ask Him what He wants me to share.

3.) What is your blog’s age? Supernaturally Me is 12 weeks today…woot woot!

4.) Why did you start your blog? I have a 7 year old special medical needs son along with a 4 year old daughter (5 on Sunday) and 22 month old son (23 months on Sunday). My husband is in the army which means deployments and TDY’s (temporary duty) away from home. I get asked all the time everywhere I go how I do it. I always give the short answer “by the grace of God” which is true, but this blog lets me open up more about my journey with my family. I love sharing with people how God can supernaturally give you His strength and power to get through ANYTHING.

5.) What is a tip for other bloggers? Don’t overthink it! When you have a topic you want to write about, go full throttle and give the people what they want. I second guess myself a lot, then I remember this is what God told me to talk about. I can’t argue with Him.

6.) What is something you wish someone would have told you before starting your blog? I wish I would have known that blogging is like talking to like minded individuals with similar interests. No need to write like you’re writing a textbook or novel. Be free to be yourself and speak from your heart the same way you speak to people. Had I known this before, I would have started blogging as soon I stopped working in corporate America 9 years ago.

7.) What’s one word that best describes your blog? Relatable

8.) Who is your favorite blogger and why? I honestly don’t read a lot of blogs. I’m more of vlogger follower. If you’re a faith based entrepreneur, you’ve most likely heard of Tiphani Montogmery. I love her Periscopes!

9.) When is your usual post day for your new blogs? Tuesdays. This is early enough in the week to get the blog written then I can Periscope later in the week.

10.) What is one of your blogging fears? I fear that I may write something someone doesn’t find interesting. Even if it’s a situation the person hasn’t experienced, I hope they find my sense of humor refreshing and can at least sympathize with the struggles of parenthood.

11.) We all have that one person in mind that would make our LIFE of they read one of our blogs. Who would that person be for you?  As stated above, Tiphani Montgomery. I think she’s hilariously funny and definitely knows Jesus Christ. I would be so tickled, yet honored, if she read one of my posts.

11 Random Facts About Me

  1. I’ve worn glasses since I was 2 years old.
  2. Some of my earliest memories start at age 2. I remember going skating with my parents at that age.
  3. I was an only child for 8 years, 10 months, and 8 days. I adore my little sister. She’s gorgeous and creative…like me.
  4. I graduated from high school in the top 10% of my class…number 7 to be exact. I was voted Most Likely to Succeed.
  5. I met my husband my freshman year of college at The University of Georgia. We’ve been together for 18 years,  married almost 10 years. Aww!!!
  6. My husband’s birthday is on the 4th, I’m the 31st, my oldest son is the 15th, my daughter is the 22nd, and my baby boy is the 22nd. All equal to 4 through adding or subtracting. I think that’s pretty cool!
  7. My favorite holidays are Christmas and Independence Day. For the record, I can only listen to Christmas music after Thanksgiving and ends on New Year’s Day.
  8. I ran 2 10 milers and 2 half marathons a year after my daughter was born. I impressed myself back then.
  9. I have 2 Bachelors (Telecommunications and Drama), a Masters in HR, worked in health insurance and banking industry, and now I’m a stay at home mom working to be an entrepreneur. Sometimes it takes a while to get focused:)
  10. I’ve been relaxer free since 2009. I long transitioned and cut ends in 2011. I went heat free in 2014. I’ve only had heat on my hair once in almost 4 years. No heat at all for the last 3 years. My Naturalistas will understand:)
  11. The beach is my favorite place to be!

My nominees for the Liebster Award are…

1) The World Traveling Mom – Jessie is a wife and mom of 2 boys. She travels with her family as an outlet to get away from the full time job of being Mom. She has a post with great tips for traveling to Disneyworld you should check out if you have kids and plan on going to Disney soon. I’ll be using these tips for my trip in July.

2) A Fashionable Believer – Chelsea sure knows how to rock some beautiful, colorful dresses and skirts…and other items, too. Who says you can’t love Christ while being cute? Be sure to read her anniversary post where she talks about how she met her husband. So sweet!

3) The Pretty Little Hustler – Kacie is a young lady living it up in NYC. I love NYC, so it’s nice to see someone in her 20’s taking on the Big Apple and making “pretty” moves. She has lots of posts with tips, gift guides, and travel around the city. Read her post about how to nail an interview, great tips!

4) A Glimmer in Her Eye – Follow the lives of two expatriates, husband and wife, living in Austria. I’ve traveled abroad but never lived outside the US. I love seeing the world through their eyes. Her post about moving while abroad will have you on the edge of your seat. Go read about what happened!

5) Chain Movers – We find many mom blogs out there, but here’s a dad blog with my type of interests. Josh lives in my home state of Georgia with his wife and 2 kids. Read his entry blog post about why his blog is called Chain Movers. I love seeing a man write about life from a dad’s perspective.

6) Baby Chicks and Seasonings – I need to step my game up after reading about this hot momma. Cinthya has a cute, everyday mom style that we can all follow whether we work a job outside the home or work a job inside the home (motherhood). Read her travel essentials post for some practical tips to stay fly.

7) Two Beautiful Disasters – In the words of my daughter, Ashley and Meghan are adorbs! I love women who can keep it real about life. Yes, it’s beautiful, but it can be a disaster of a hot mess sometimes. We always get through, and they show you how. Their recent blog post is so great for tweens and teens as they feature a company called STRONG Self(ie). STRONG Self(ie) offers a monthly subscription box as well as empowers young girl to be confident and strong. I love it!

8) Mocha Divas – Desiree is very inspiring, encouraging us to live our lives the fullest. You can’t help but to smile reading her posts about food and happenings around town. I particularly loved her post about breaking out of comfort zones. We could all use that push.

9) Azarya Life & Style – These 2 sisters, Amara and Chidera, are very bright young ladies inspiring others to live life on purpose with the help of God. I love seeing young people calling on God for their strength knowing it is because of Him that all things are possible. Their recent blog post hits the nail on the head with tips on how to trust God. Check it out!

10) Raising Little’ns – Friends and first time moms, Amelia and Jodie, give you the real about being a mom. They don’t give you the fluff that the internet or books talk about. I love their Confessions of a Bad Mum category (they’re British; therefore, mum). Sometimes they feature stories from other moms, you’re not alone. I love the one about dropping your phone on your baby’s head. Yes, I’ve done that several times to all 3 of my kids, lol.

11) Let There B Dance – My daughter loves to dance and is currently taking ballet and tap. Mary takes her over 30 years experience of teaching dance and provides lessons and tips with her expert flair. She has a very helpful post about 3 basic ballet steps. I need this information so I know what Zoe’s talking about as she tells me about her upcoming recital, hehe.

11 Questions for the Nominees

  1. Why did you start your blog?
  2. What are your goals for your blog? Is this a hobby or are you working towards a business, if you haven’t started one already?
  3. Who or what is your motivation to continue blogging?
  4. What is something you’ve learned about yourself since you started blogging?
  5. What was the time frame from the moment you got the idea to start a blog to the second you published your first post?
  6. What is your favorite compliment you’ve received from a reader?
  7. How do you market your blog to get the word out and gain subscribers/readers?
  8. Are there any bloggers that you follow who inspire you?
  9. Do you only write blog posts or do you also video blog on other social media platforms?
  10. Do you plan your blog topics ahead of time or write a post as something comes to mind?
  11. What feeling do you get after you’ve worked hard on a post then hit publish?

Thanks for coming along this ride with me. Sending love and hope your way!

~Shanetta

Baby fat go bye bye

In my 20’s, I could eat whatever I wanted and would lose weight. I could think of my dream body and BAM, I’d be thin again. Even after my first 2 kids (2nd one in my early 30’s) I had a pretty good snap back with healthy eating and exercise. That was once upon a time.

Can I get those days back? I can and I will.

After the birth of my 3rd child, um, yeah, I mean…what happened, y’all? No one told me after the 3rd one it would be harder to get the weight off.

I understand that it gets harder to stay in shape and lose weight as you get older. I just didn’t think 33 was “older” and that it wouldn’t be the same as having a baby at 30. Maybe it’s the hustle and bustle of life and taking care of 3 kids. I don’t have as much time for myself as I used to.

As I said in a previous post, (read my post from March 6) I am a very disciplined person in the moment. But lately I get easily distracted. When I take a break from healthy living, that break lasts longer than it should.

I don’t just fall off the wagon. I fall off, find a slice of pizza on the side of the road, find out there’s a pizzeria around the corner, then build a new home there.

I gained 50 pounds with each 3 of my kids. No, I don’t believe in eating for 2. I ate everything I wanted to eat for 1…me, moi, mí. So I don’t blame the weight gain on being pregnant. I take full responsibility for it. I was going gain weight anyway so I might as well eat I want. I would worry about getting the weight off later. If I had to do it again…AND I WON’T…I would do it differently.

After Taj and Zoe, I was able to lose 30 pounds before my 6 week check up. Woot woot! Then, I was able to run and do home workouts to lose weight the extra 20. Weight Watchers was also helpful. It helped me to get my portions back in check, and it made me make healthier food choices.

I started running 5K’s, 10 milers, and half marathons. After Zoe, I lost an extra 10 pounds for a total weight loss of 60 pounds. I was able to do this before her 1st birthday so I was proud of myself. (See above photos)

I gained that 10 back before I got pregnant with Kai, then I gained the faithful 50 back during his pregnancy. I was successful at losing my typical 30 pounds before the 6 week check up. But something changed from then to now. To this day I’m still stuck with the last 20 pounds to lose, and Kai will be 2 in May.

I’m mom tired…meaning, I don’t always eat healthy and I don’t always feel like working out because I like rewarding myself with food or just laying on the couch doing nothing when the kids are away or asleep. I really need to increase my will power from 32% to at least 51%. I’ll get to 100% soon enough.

I was talking to my cousin about losing weight and we both agreed that we have to do what’s best for our bodies. I’m tired of doing research and talking to fitness professionals and being told to do the same thing everyone else does. I get bored and need variety. Nobody puts Shanetta in a corner. Lol

So here I am again…drafting a new plan to get healthy and in shape before my 36th birthday this summer. But this time, I’m making a lifestyle change that will carry me into my 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, and beyond.

I want to show the world and be an example to moms that you can lose the weight and attain your dream body. You can be a busy person and still take your health seriously. I’m finding my groove but trust me, I will get there.

You all are my accountability partners. I’ve shared my current struggle and don’t mind putting my business out there. I can’t wait to come back for my birthday and show you the work I’ve done. Hold me to it!

Your struggle may be something different or it may be the same. No matter what it is, you can overcome it.  You will win!

Sending love and hope your way!

Stop, drop, and roll with it

When I was a little girl, I loved watching The Jetsons. They were the future! They were what I thought my adulthood would be like.

Riding around in space cars, robots as maids, and many household gadgets to make life easier. 2018 is here, and we’re not too far off from that 80’s cartoon. However; has it been to our detriment?

I’ll explain. I naturally move at a fast pace. When I slow down it literally makes me itch. When I want something, I want it now. When I’m going somewhere, I want to get there fast.  When it’s time to leave the house, I get aggravated with my kids for intentionally moving slow.

Maybe it’s the Generation Y in me, but I keep telling myself to slow down, take life in, and enjoy the ride.

I like to be in control of my day because I have a lot going on. I try to keep a certain pace so that I’m able to make every appointment on time. Of course, things happen, and I may get thrown off course. Most times I get mad at myself for not adding in that extra buffer of time to account for the unknown.

Last weekend, I was cleaning up in between giving the kids baths and dressed for the day. I had to get myself dressed as well to get to my pamper session at the spa. But once my husband got home, we started talking. The next thing I know, I had 40 minutes to get in the shower, dressed, and to my appointment on time.

The whole way there I’m beating myself up for mismanaging my time. I was being an over achiever trying to get things done before my appointment. Then God said to me, “Chill out, relax, and stop idolizing yourself. You say you trust Me so stop thinking you’re Superowman on your own”. ( Yeah, He talks to me like that.)

He and I have had previous conversations like this before. I think I can do all things, and He reminds me that I can but only through Him who strengthens me.

So I let it go because at this point I’m going to get there just in time. Well……I made a work turn and got lost. I have to call the spa to ask them what street I should turn on to get to their location. She tells me to go back where I made the wrong turn and go down one more street.

I arrive 15 minutes late. The esthetician doing my wax reassured me she would work fast to get me to my massage on time. We’ve been working together for about 3 years now so we have a smooth routine down now.

She gets me finished in 10 minutes…whoo hoo…with 5 minutes to spare before my massage. God was like, “See, I told you to trust Me”.

The massage therapist was so nice and she helped me to relax even more. Oh how I love a good massage!

But wait my friends, the story doesn’t end there. After the massage I have to rush home to pick Zoe up and take her skating with some friends. I get home and she’s escaped to our neighbors’ house to play with her friend. I go there to pick her up and they invite me in to meet their new puppy. I couldn’t resist. She was a cute puppy, y’all!

As I’m talking I’m also thinking in my head, “Ugh, I’m about to be late once again”. In case you guys haven’t noticed, I don’t like being late. BUT God reminded me again to trust Him and don’t worry about it.

I get a text from our friends at the skating rink that they ordered pizza and would wait for us to skate. Amen! Zoe and I got there in time to skate with them for about an hour.

I’m telling you this story as an example of one day of many where I get caught up in myself thinking I have everything under control, and God has to remind me that He’s in control. We don’t exactly live in the Jetsons era, and I can’t beam myself around town to get to places on time.

Doing too much too fast then beating myself up is my character flaw. Your’s  may be something  different. No matter what it is, just know that when you take time to pause, breathe, and trust God, all things work out the way they’re supposed to. Why worry and stress when we have a Father who will take care of that for us?

It’s a day by day process for me. But God doesn’t ask for us to get it together on our own. His yoke is easy and His burden is light. I promise I’ll let Him handle my burdens from now on. I pray that you do the same.

Sending love and hope your way!

 

You are not alone…I’m here with you!

Whew…sigh…breathe…relax.

Listen up moms and dads. We’re all on this ride together, and we must hold on to each other and make sure we’re okay.

This ride called parenthood is a busy one. From school events, home chores, and extracurricular activities, there’s always something to do and needs to be done.

Sometimes I just want to stay in bed and pray everything takes care of itself. If someone figures out how to do that, please let me know.

Since becoming a mom almost 8 years ago, (wow’s, its been that long) there have been plenty of times I have to lay my wants and needs aside to take care of my kids. Sacrifice, I think that’s what it’s called.

And dealing with Taj, especially in the early years, it was tough going to doctor appointments and therapy sessions. Some appointments were so boring. We would be there for 4 hours with one doctor coming in for 15 minutes, wait an hour, then another doctor would come in to talk, and so on.

Now that we’ve added 2 more to the bunch, there’s even more to do. Gymnastics, dance, soccer, swim…there’s hardly any time for a free moment to breathe and relax.

We went to a meeting at Taj’s school last week and a parent mentioned that once Taj enters middle school he’s eligible to play team sports. I smiled thinking it’s great Taj could possibly be on the bowling team, yet, I cringed at the idea of another activity we would be adding to our already overflowing plate in the years to come. Yikes!

Having a special medical needs child is totally new to me. I never knew anyone with a child like Taj or similar for that matter. The only children with disabilities that I encountered was when I volunteered to help with the Special Olympics in middle school.

I went to therapy 3 years ago to talk to someone about my feelings and what I was experiencing being a mom to a special medical needs child. She explained that although Taj is living, I was still grieving. You may be wondering the same thing I was when she said that. How can you grieve someone who is still alive?

She explained that I had the hopes and dreams during pregnancy of having a healthy, bouncing baby boy just like all the pregnancy books and websites talked about. But I needed to grieve the idea of Taj that I had and he didn’t become. My husband’s and my life changed not only because we were new parents, but because we were new parents to a child who wasn’t typically developing as most children. And to be honest, he most likely wouldn’t.

But one thing about me that sets me apart is I don’t take what anyone says, including medical professionals, and think it’s the end all be all. The Bible says in Romans 3:4, let God be true and every man a liar.

I pray fervently over Taj, Zoe, and Kai. Taj has a long way to go to catch up with the mental and physical abilities of Zoe and Kai, but my big faith keeps me praising God for the miracles that will manifest in his future.

Parenthood is tiring, demanding, and challenging, but at the same time energizing, rewarding, and manageable.

If you’re a parent reading this, just know that I’m with you. I’ve seen the worst of days, and I’ve seen the best of days. What I don’t do is let the worst of days happen too frequently and keep me bogged down. There’s too much good in life to focus on the negative all the time.

As I speak to you I’m preaching to myself because I’m about to be snowed in for the next 24 hours with these crumb snatching rugrats, so I need a little pep talk. Parents have a lot of responsibility, but we wouldn’t trade our little love bugs for anything.

My challenge for you today is share and empathize with a mommy or daddy who feels like parenthood is dragging them along without their consent. Be a friendly reminder that everyday won’t be easy, but each day will be filled with love. And just think, they don’t stay babies forever. They do grow up to become adult babies that will leave your house and your bank account. Yay, thank God!

Sending love, hope, and peace your way!

Take the LEAP!

SPOILER ALERT!!! Sort of…

Last summer, I took my daughter to see the movie Leap. She’s taking ballet so I thought it would be a cute movie for her to watch. Last week, we watched it again on Netflix.

If you haven’t seen this movie, stop reading this post right now and find it on Netflix or a Redbox near you. If you have seen it, isn’t it such an inspiring movie? Either way, come back and finish reading.

Of course Zoe was fascinated by the pirouettes, arabesques, and sautés. But for me this movie is far more than just ballet. I see a message in everything, so I was very encouraged by the storyline.

It teaches children, as well as adults, to follow your dreams. This message is so real in my house these days. Zoe has an interest in being a doctor when she grows up, and I’m going to make sure she learns what she needs to know to make her dream come true. Maybe she’ll be a ballerina doctor. Hmmm.

My favorite line in the movie is, “If you never leap, you’ll never know what’s its like to fly”.

That line hit me like a freight train. Ok God, I get it! I want to fly. I want to soar. I have to leap.

I think over my life and count the numerous times I let fear get in my way of doing something. I’m finally at a point where I can say, “Screw it…let me at least try”. I definitely can’t pass that fear along to Dr. Zoe, so I have to straighten up.

Another fascinating part of the movie was how the main character, Félicie, just knew she was a dancer even when she didn’t have the steps down and looked like somebody’s old Auntie dancing at the family reunion. She even called herself a dancer when she hadn’t even stepped foot in a dance studio to train, yet.

If that’s not believing in yourself, I don’t know what is. That’s the type of belief I want to instill in my children. Honestly, I’m learning that for myself as I type.

I’m learning to take the leap. I’ve been a stay at home mom for 8 years and got stuck in my comfort zone. Now it’s time to take my leap.

I’m jumping into unknown territory. I’m jumping into uncharted territory. I’m jumping into unlit territory. It’s scary, but will be worth it.

Come along this journey with me to take the leap. What are you leaping towards? Don’t be afraid to jump out there and fly. While you’re at it, take in the beautiful scenery and bask in the warm sun.

Sending love and hope your way!

Help! I won’t be taken down

SOS…send a life jacket, a flotation device, or a helicopter. I’m drowning in inconsistency.

This is a transparent post so y’all stay with a sista.

I’ve always been a pretty disciplined person. When I get started on a task, I’m gung ho and ready to go. No one can stop me or throw me off course…except when inconsistency shows up.

I remember when I was in college my boyfriend – now husband – would tell me that I get so excited and involved in something then when the newness wanes I move on to something else. So when I would get involved and excited in a new project, he was waiting for it to end.

I didn’t think about it much then, but I think about it a lot now when I embark on a new journey. BECAUSE I’M STILL THAT WAY! Eighteen years later and I’m still inconsistent. I know, so sad. Y’all pray for me.

So what’s the deal? Why can I only read half a book these days? Why can I only stick to a healthy eating regimen for maybe 2 weeks? Why can I change a habit then get bored after 7 days?

This is something I’ve seriously been asking God about and seeking His help on doing better. All is not totally lost; I get things done. But I’ve noticed when it’s something tied to my God given destiny, my attention span is cut short and I’m easily distracted.

I’m sharing this with you because God has placed some ideas in me that require a level of focus and attention that I need to be consistent with or it won’t come to fruition. I also want to be taken seriously. Most people don’t know this about me, and I don’t want to introduce myself to the business world as Shanetta “Inconsistent” Kindred.

I’m getting myself together one day at a time by working on one thing at a time. I know that I get bored easily, so I have to spice things up and tweak some things in order for me to continue on.

First, my prayer life has gotten better. I’m not going to lie, I haven’t always prayed when I wake up and before I go to bed. I’ve made it a point to get my communication with God consistent because that’s going to be key to get everything else in line.

Second, I set a reasonable time frame that I want to get something accomplished. I’m a stay at home mom, so I try to set my own deadlines as if I work in an office. It helps me to stay on course to completing the task.

Third, I don’t beat myself up when I get knocked down. This may sound simple, but when I’m too hard on myself for being human, it’s like I dig myself further in a whole. The quicker I shake it off, the quicker I can hop back on the horse and keep riding. This has been so helpful for me lately.

Being consistent and persistent has helped a lot of people reach their success. I refuse to be a shoulda coulda woulda. I will not grow old and tell my kids that mommy couldn’t get it right and is now unaccomplished.

I bind the enemy right now in the name of Jesus. What he’s trying to keep me from is my God given destiny. He has no right to my future. So now when I feel inconsistency coming on I know that it’s something that I have to keep pressing forward, and it going to take a little more effort to push through.

I’m up for the challenge. I’m always looking to be better and do better. I don’t want to be an “old, stuck in my ways, this is just who I am” type of person. No! I’m growing to be better person. So, yes, I’m 35 years old and I still have dreams of what I want to be when I grow up. But as I said in last week’s post, I will make my dreams a reality.

Whew! I’m glad I got that out. And I thank you for reading. Do you, too, have problems with inconsistency? If so, I’d love to hear about you combat it. I could use some other helpful tips and insight. And we can be battle buddies helping each other through this war to see victory and completion.

Sending love and hope your way!

I am the future of Black History

All months matter! Don’t laugh, I’m being serious…kind of. Every month is a big deal because we always find a cause, event, holiday, the dog’s birthday, or whatever to celebrate. There’s always a reason to get dressed up, have a feast, or turn on some music and dance. Year round fun is where it’s at…woot woot!

Ok, now that I’ve named a festivity for everyone to celebrate, let me celebrate my people. February is a very special month to black people, or African Americans for those who are politically correct. I’m not, so I’m going to say black people.

Let me give you a little bit of background as to how Black History Month began. In 1926, Carter G. Woodson began celebrating Black History Week the second week of February. This was due to Abraham Lincoln’s birthday (February 12) and Frederick Douglass’ birthday (February 14) during that week. This was a celebratory time of year for most black Americans.

In the late 1960’s and early 70’s, colleges and cities began celebrating black history the whole month of February. It was then declared by President Gerald Ford in 1976 that February would be Black History Month.

My husband and I are already instilling in our children that the greatness that lies within them doesn’t have to remain a dream. Anything they want to be and anything they want to do are within arms reach as long as they have a plan to get there.

My daughter, Zoe, was in a Black History presentation at church this past Sunday, and they sung a song with lyrics that said, “I am the future, a bright black future. I am the future of black history”.

I explained to Zoe that right now she’s already on the path to be becoming someone that will be read about in history books, in articles, in publications, etc. We teach her to dream big, because if it’s possible for her, myself, or my husband to make happen, then she’s dreaming too small. Her goals in life should be so big that it takes the supernatural power of God to bring to fruition.

This applies to all of you as well. Don’t stay stuck in your dream world thinking that great success is only for those people over there. Anything that God has called you to, He will give provision for you to make it happen.

What if our forefathers stayed stuck in a dream of one day being free? What if our ancestors stayed stuck in a dream of one day earning an advanced degree? What if our grandparents stayed stuck in a dream of one day being business owners or home owners?

The time is now to create the future of black history. There are so many people to look to who are living out their dreams. And I’m not just talking about famous people who live their lives publicly, but look to some local leaders living out their God given purpose. As you look at them and admire, also aspire to do great or greater than what they have accomplished.

We teach our children to be greater than us, and greater than our parents. We should be leaving knowledge and money to our children and grandchildren so that each generation builds upon what the previous generation started. No more placing blame on your upbringing and complaining about what your parents and family didn’t do for you. Pick up where you and just start to do better. Greatness is in all of us!

Most people have now seen the newly released “Black Panther” on the big screen. It was not only an awesome, action packed Marvel masterpiece, but it was an inspiring story of how powerful, intelligent, and beautiful a people we are. I don’t know about you but I walked out of that movie with my head held high and ready to take on the world. I won’t go any further to give any details away to those who for some reason haven’t seen it yet. But if you haven’t, RUN to the theater to see it now.

So my challenge for you today is to think about the legacy you’re going to leave on this earth. What are you going to be known for in the years to come? I am a part of black history, and I want you to join me. Be free to share how you’re going to leave your dreams behind to make them a reality. Get it out of your head and into your hands. Black History is now!

Sending love and hope your way!